Computer related jokes

Chat about just about anything else

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby austin.texas on Thu Apr 24, 2014 1:01 pm

TechGuyAndrew wrote:Even dumb people can use computers...many do.

So you get... Windows 8
Mint 17 v2 Cinnamon (64 bit), Quad core AMD A8-3870 with Radeon HD Graphics 6550D, 8GB DDR3, Ralink RT2561/RT61 802.11g PCI
Microsoft-free environment since 1996

To help Linux Mint with a donation, please visit http://www.linuxmint.com/donors.php
User avatar
austin.texas
Level 11
Level 11
 
Posts: 3744
Joined: Tue Nov 17, 2009 3:57 pm
Location: at /home

Linux Mint is funded by ads and donations.
 

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby wanderer7 on Thu Apr 24, 2014 1:50 pm

austin.texas wrote:
TechGuyAndrew wrote:Even dumb people can use computers...many do.

So you get... Windows 8


:lol: :lol: :lol:
User avatar
wanderer7
Level 4
Level 4
 
Posts: 258
Joined: Mon Oct 28, 2013 3:13 pm

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby wanderer7 on Thu Apr 24, 2014 1:54 pm

Bill Gates eventually arrives at the the day of judgement.

St. Peter greets him, and explains that while he did contribute a lot of money to charities, he also ripped a lot of people off when they were forced to pay for his software if they wanted to buy a piece of hardware from a store.

St. Peter says that under the circumstances, he will give Gates the choice of going to heaven or going to hell, and offers a tour. Gates accepts, and first St. peter takes him to heaven. In heaven, Gates sees a very serene place, with people discussing philosophy and walking together through a wooded landscape.

They then move on to hell. Gates sees a big beach party, with everyone fornicating, smoking cigarettes, eating gourmet food, and drinking.

When Gates is asked, he chooses to go to hell, and is immediately plunged into a firey furnace with the screams of tortured souls deafening him.

"Hey, St. Pete, what's all this?" screams Gates "Where's the beach party?".
"Oh, I only showed you the demo version." St.Peter replies.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This one is from gnu.org
User avatar
wanderer7
Level 4
Level 4
 
Posts: 258
Joined: Mon Oct 28, 2013 3:13 pm

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby Brain Virus on Thu Apr 24, 2014 10:57 pm

Image

Its not a bug....
Surgically Wired Into Paradise
User avatar
Brain Virus
Level 1
Level 1
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Apr 22, 2014 11:43 pm

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby RacerBG on Fri Apr 25, 2014 4:57 am

A picture is worth a thousand words: :lol:

Image
Linux Mint User
User avatar
RacerBG
Level 4
Level 4
 
Posts: 273
Joined: Sun Mar 03, 2013 4:31 am
Location: Bulgaria

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby austin.texas on Fri Apr 25, 2014 7:19 am

RacerBG wrote:A picture is worth a thousand words: :lol:
Image

And how many monkeys on how many computers did it take?
Mint 17 v2 Cinnamon (64 bit), Quad core AMD A8-3870 with Radeon HD Graphics 6550D, 8GB DDR3, Ralink RT2561/RT61 802.11g PCI
Microsoft-free environment since 1996

To help Linux Mint with a donation, please visit http://www.linuxmint.com/donors.php
User avatar
austin.texas
Level 11
Level 11
 
Posts: 3744
Joined: Tue Nov 17, 2009 3:57 pm
Location: at /home

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby eanfrid on Fri Apr 25, 2014 7:35 am

Classics...

"There are only 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don't."

"The trouble with quotes on the Internet is that you can never know if they are genuine." --Abraham Lincoln
Main desktop: Debian GNU/Linux Wheezy 64bit - MATE 1.8.1
(i5 2400@3.7GHz - 16GB DDR3 - HD6770 w/radeon driver - SSD+RAID1)
Safer than Dropbox
User avatar
eanfrid
Level 7
Level 7
 
Posts: 1871
Joined: Mon Apr 30, 2012 2:49 am
Location: FR

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby Pilosopong Tasyo on Fri Apr 25, 2014 7:56 am

Reposting this from 4 years ago: :mrgreen:

Tech Support | California, USA

Caller: “I need to report a very serious computer crime! The local university is running an illegal computer system!”

Me: “Could you please repeat that?”

Caller: “The local university is running an illegal computer system! They’ve hacked it!”

Me: “How could you tell they’d hacked it?”

Caller: “Well, when it booted, it didn’t say Windows or Microsoft or anything! It said something about Deviant Linux, I think, and the main screen looked nothing like my good, legal Windows screen at home! I think they hacked that, too!”

Me: “Do you mean Debian Linux?”

Caller: “Yes, that! Is it some sort of computer mafia or something?”

Me: “Uh, no, it’s just a different operating system. Nothing to worry about.”

Caller: “But it’s illegal! It’s not Microsoft, not even Windows! They’re on a normal Microsoft computer, so they’re breaking the law! I think they stole my identity when I came in the building! I’m calling the FBI!” *hangs up*
Image
o Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish and he will eat for a lifetime!
o If an issue has been fixed, please edit your first post and add the word [SOLVED].
User avatar
Pilosopong Tasyo
Level 6
Level 6
 
Posts: 1184
Joined: Mon Jun 22, 2009 3:26 am
Location: Philippines

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby jahid on Fri Apr 25, 2014 9:41 am

Pilosopong Tasyo wrote:Reposting this from 4 years ago: :mrgreen:

Tech Support | California, USA
..........................................................................................................................................
Me: “Do you mean Debian Linux?”

Caller: “Yes, that! Is it some sort of computer mafia or something?”


:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
this part is really something else. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
jahid@HP ProBook 440 G1 Laptop
User avatar
jahid
Level 5
Level 5
 
Posts: 898
Joined: Sat Dec 07, 2013 4:07 pm
Location: Khulna, Bangladesh

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby Previous1 on Fri Apr 25, 2014 10:39 am

this part is really something else

I'm sure this actually happened ... :twisted:
Image
Tutorials | cynicaltux
Arch Linux i3wm, 64bit
User avatar
Previous1
Level 4
Level 4
 
Posts: 367
Joined: Sun Dec 01, 2013 11:48 am

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby RacerBG on Fri Apr 25, 2014 2:34 pm

austin.texas wrote:
RacerBG wrote:A picture is worth a thousand words: :lol:
Image

And how many monkeys on how many computers did it take?


It's simple - the monkeys created Windows 8 designed for monkeys. I can't answer your question unfortunately. :D
Linux Mint User
User avatar
RacerBG
Level 4
Level 4
 
Posts: 273
Joined: Sun Mar 03, 2013 4:31 am
Location: Bulgaria

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby Previous1 on Fri Apr 25, 2014 3:44 pm

And how many monkeys on how many computers did it take?

According to the zoo keeper, over 3 million.
Image
Tutorials | cynicaltux
Arch Linux i3wm, 64bit
User avatar
Previous1
Level 4
Level 4
 
Posts: 367
Joined: Sun Dec 01, 2013 11:48 am

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby The-Wizard on Sat Apr 26, 2014 4:29 am

at the end of a long tech support call

"" well sir we have now tracked the problem. you have a RFM fault""

" is it serious"







""no sir just READ THE FRIGGING MANUAL""
asus M2N-MX board, AMD x2 6000 amd/ati graphics 4x1mb ddr2, 21" HD screen Mint 17-64 cinnamon
Acer ZG5 -peppermint dell 1545 mint 17-64

"I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that i don't know the answer " [Douglas Adams]
User avatar
The-Wizard
Level 9
Level 9
 
Posts: 2512
Joined: Fri Jan 28, 2011 3:12 pm
Location: Bedforshire, ENGLAND

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby Crewp on Sat Apr 26, 2014 10:59 am

Good one Wizard, :lol: Hey, did you lose your avatar again? :mrgreen:
Image
User avatar
Crewp
Level 5
Level 5
 
Posts: 782
Joined: Sat Dec 01, 2012 8:36 pm
Location: Connecticut

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby TechGuyAndrew on Sat Apr 26, 2014 5:37 pm

There is no place like 127.0.0.1
User avatar
TechGuyAndrew
Level 2
Level 2
 
Posts: 85
Joined: Thu Nov 07, 2013 2:10 pm
Location: Central Florida, USA

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby austin.texas on Sat Apr 26, 2014 5:42 pm

And there is no place like /home
Mint 17 v2 Cinnamon (64 bit), Quad core AMD A8-3870 with Radeon HD Graphics 6550D, 8GB DDR3, Ralink RT2561/RT61 802.11g PCI
Microsoft-free environment since 1996

To help Linux Mint with a donation, please visit http://www.linuxmint.com/donors.php
User avatar
austin.texas
Level 11
Level 11
 
Posts: 3744
Joined: Tue Nov 17, 2009 3:57 pm
Location: at /home

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby RacerBG on Sun Apr 27, 2014 4:39 am

What happened to me at 15th of February this year:

georgi@PC ~ $ sudo apt-get install girlfriend
Reading package lists... Done
Building dependency tree
Reading state information... Done
E: Unable to locate package girlfriend


What a bad luck I have! :lol:
Linux Mint User
User avatar
RacerBG
Level 4
Level 4
 
Posts: 273
Joined: Sun Mar 03, 2013 4:31 am
Location: Bulgaria

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby wanderer7 on Sun Apr 27, 2014 5:00 am

Computer: Please, press any key.
User: But where's this any-key?!
User avatar
wanderer7
Level 4
Level 4
 
Posts: 258
Joined: Mon Oct 28, 2013 3:13 pm

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby jahid on Sun Apr 27, 2014 5:31 am

RacerBG wrote:What happened to me at 15th of February this year:

georgi@PC ~ $ sudo apt-get install girlfriend
Reading package lists... Done
Building dependency tree
Reading state information... Done
E: Unable to locate package girlfriend


What a bad luck I have! :lol:


15th february?, i see...
the repository was outdated........
find new sources which will supposedly work upto next 14th february or find Long Term Supported (LTS) sources....
jahid@HP ProBook 440 G1 Laptop
User avatar
jahid
Level 5
Level 5
 
Posts: 898
Joined: Sat Dec 07, 2013 4:07 pm
Location: Khulna, Bangladesh

Re: Computer related jokes

Postby wanderer7 on Mon Apr 28, 2014 10:43 am

Do you agree?
Attachments
1.jpg
User avatar
wanderer7
Level 4
Level 4
 
Posts: 258
Joined: Mon Oct 28, 2013 3:13 pm

Linux Mint is funded by ads and donations.
 
PreviousNext

Return to Open chat

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests