Last night was the coolest of them all at the Mint lounge.
What a bunch! After a few refreshing Mint Juleps, everybody stopped being serious and they started telling stories.
The Fortune Machine
At the Grand Central Station, Joe Pasta stopped at the bar for a drink. He had some time to kill before his train would leave for Chicago.
In the corner across the room, Joe noticed something that looked like a game machine.
The bright, colorful screen, read: FORTUNES! PREDICTIONS! PRIZES! ONLY 50 CENTS!
So he went to the machine, to have some fun. After all, he had lots of time before the 9:45 train.
He puts a coin in it and pulls the lever down.
A few flashes and a message appears:
You are Joe Pasta, age 35, a plumber, resident of New York City, and you are waiting for the 9:45 train to Chicago.
Congratulations! Your IQ registers above average!
Have a nice trip Sir.
Joe couldn't believe his eyes. "How could a slot machine know so much about me", he thought.
"Nah! There's gotta be a gimmick to it. Maybe there's a guy I know, behind all this, that's pulling my leg".
He goes back to the bar for another drink. "Make it a double cause I ain't got much time left", he told the bartender.
But Joe's curiosity was too much. He goes back to the machine.
The coin in, the lever down, and a new message flashes: You are Joe Pasta, age 35, a plumber, resident of New York City, and you are waiting for the 9:45 train for Chicago, blah, blah, blah.
" Damn it!" he thought, "I ain't gonna take any more s**t from you".
He had to go to the men's room. There, he saw a hobo with a dirty jacket and a filthy hat. Then, an idea popped in his head.
He says to the man: "could I borrow your jacket and your hat for 10 minutes. I'll give you 5 dollars!"
Back to the machine again. "This time I'm sure gonna fool the damn machine", he thought.
Another coin in and a message pops up!:
You are Joe Pasta, age 35, a plumber, blah, blah, blah......
Nobody can fool me! Joe Pasta!
Your IQ does not register any more. The meter points to the red IDIOT range!
By a recent time check and a re-evaluation of your appearance, as well as the odor of your breath,
it is evident that you are not going anywhere this evening.
Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.