Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

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Portreve
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Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

Post by Portreve » Sun Sep 02, 2018 7:20 pm

I'm certain you folks have all heard really crazy stuff from people with respect to tech support.

Here's two which come to my mind:

I was working for Sony and took an escalation from a third-party call center rep. The customer's problem was they couldn't connect their laptop to the Internet.

The prior rep had gone through massive amounts of Windows (WinXP) troubleshooting, blowing away and reinstalling network devices, running the Windows Network Troubleshooting Wizard, and so on, all to absolutely no effect.

So, I took the call and after verifying the customer's identity and kind of skimming over what had already been tried, the very first question I asked them was: “Who is your ISP?” “What do you mean?” the customer asked back. “Your Internet Service Provider. Who do you use?” “I don't know what you mean.” “Well, who provides you an Internet connection?” The customer had absolutely no clue what I was talking about, so I gave examples of Telstra, Comcast, Sprint, etc. The long and the short of it is they didn't have an ISP because...

wait for it...

the laptop was wireless and so it should be able to just get onto the Internet. That's what the salesman told them.

After the call, I had to go take a break and get a coffee because I couldn't hold back the laughter any longer.


Ok, second crazy thing...

Recently (well, several months ago now) the company I work for had a computer used by the manager at the store. In the course of my team and I being there, it happened that the backlight on the LCD panel failed. You could still see an image if you held a very bright flashlight up to the screen, but it was impossible to function in that way.

The manager called up our internal tech support department to get it replaced, and she described the problem to them exactly verbatim as follows:

“The face of the computer blowed.”

You just can't make this crap up.
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Re: Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

Post by phd21 » Sun Sep 02, 2018 9:57 pm

HI Portreve,

I have been doing tech support for over 30years on-site and remotely, so I know how you and other tech support people feel.

10 Amazing Tech Support Stories That Actually Happened
https://www.makeuseof.com/tag/10-best-t ... es-reddit/


Hope this helps ...
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Re: Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

Post by all41 » Sun Sep 02, 2018 10:05 pm

One of the funniest I have heard,
"The computer reboots when the toilet flushes"
https://www.theregister.co.uk/2017/06/23/on_call/
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Re: Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

Post by lsemmens » Sun Sep 02, 2018 10:55 pm

Thanks for those, they are going to entertain me for a good hour or two now.

My story is not nearly as entertaining. Back in the early days of DOS, I had passed on an old computer to a friend. They knew that they must put a boot floppy in the drive ( 5 1/4") to boot before powering up. I get a call that the computer would not start, but, no rush. Over the next couple of months every time I'd visit she'd say, "don't worry, room's a mess look at it next time". They were good friends who lived in the next street so we saw them often enough. Eventually I said, "stuff it, I'm going in anyway" Two seconds later I walked out with "problem solved!" Amazement all round, "What was wrong" - "Open circuit between computer and the wall!" Yep! Not plugged in!

Another friend was also having problems and rang me one evening in a panic as she needed some reports for the next morning. I race around and arrive just as she is about to have a shower. Her instructions, "I won't be long, computer is in the bedroom". I look at it, and solve the problem just as she's out of the shower. Her husband was away from home at the time. Anyway, upon relating what I did to fix it, her response was "Thank you Leigh, if I wasn't wearing this towel, I'd kiss you!" Then she realised what she'd said. We got LOTS of mileage out of that one! Again good friends, just not THAT good.:D
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Re: Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

Post by trytip » Sun Sep 02, 2018 11:21 pm

on my first day working for Earthlink back in 2001 they showed us a video. Internet helpdesk i worked there for about 6 months as internet helpdesk tech support. i didn't like the company they were more interested in quantity calls instead of quality service. the only thing i remember is the video they showed us in orientation.
Image

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Re: Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

Post by Faust » Mon Sep 03, 2018 2:49 am

trytip wrote:
Sun Sep 02, 2018 11:21 pm
..... i didn't like the company they were more interested in quantity calls instead of quality service. ......
Been there , done that ( many times , as a contractor ) ..... they are in the "Gigs from Hell " category .

Those types of company don't value their customers , and much less their staff .
The notion of growing a business by having a solid base of satisfied customers seems to be alien to them !

There was a good comedy show from the UK called " The IT Crowd " .
It was set in the basement of big city firm with a tech support team of 3 people , and the running gag was :-

Answer the phone ..... " Have you tried turning it off and on again ? " .... hang up the phone .

There are some bits on Youtube .... it might brighten up the day for anyone starting their week in just such a job ... :)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iDbyYGrswtg
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Re: Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

Post by catweazel » Mon Sep 03, 2018 3:16 am

Portreve wrote:
Sun Sep 02, 2018 7:20 pm
I'm certain you folks have all heard really crazy stuff from people with respect to tech support.
I used to have a cartoon syndicated in a national Australian broadsheet, the strip was called "Help Desk" - oh, good grief, I could tell you some funny ones. One that comes to mind is a call I took from a woman:

BANG! CRASH! SCREAM! AAAIIIEEE!!! AAARRRGGHH! SHUT UP! I'M ON THE PHONE! BANG! SCREAM! CRASH! SMASH! WAIL! WAIL! SCREAM! OH! DAMMIT! I'LL CALL BACK AFTER THE SCHOOL HOLIDAYS! <click>
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Re: Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

Post by Flemur » Mon Sep 03, 2018 11:58 am

A guy was late for work because he had to make an oxygen tent for his rat.
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Re: Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

Post by BG405 » Wed Sep 05, 2018 4:58 pm

I was late for work once because the freezer compressor was refusing to start, requiring switching off for a while to allow the starting coils to cool sufficiently. Was lodging with a mate at the time & wouldn't have been good if all the food defrosted. The boss wasn't too happy about it though, I'm crap at making excuses. :oops:

I can appreciate the rat story though. It's unfortunately quite common for older rodents (rats & mice) to develop respiratory problems. :(
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Re: Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

Post by Portreve » Wed Sep 05, 2018 7:19 pm

catweazel wrote:
Mon Sep 03, 2018 3:16 am
Portreve wrote:
Sun Sep 02, 2018 7:20 pm
I'm certain you folks have all heard really crazy stuff from people with respect to tech support.
I used to have a cartoon syndicated in a national Australian broadsheet, the strip was called "Help Desk" - oh, good grief, I could tell you some funny ones. One that comes to mind is a call I took from a woman:

BANG! CRASH! SCREAM! AAAIIIEEE!!! AAARRRGGHH! SHUT UP! I'M ON THE PHONE! BANG! SCREAM! CRASH! SMASH! WAIL! WAIL! SCREAM! OH! DAMMIT! I'LL CALL BACK AFTER THE SCHOOL HOLIDAYS! <click>
I tried obvious ways of searching for your strip, but found nothing. What was it called? Are there any extant copied still to be found?
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If your issue is solved or your question answered, please edit the first post of your thread and add [SOLVED] to the thread topic. Thanks!

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Re: Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

Post by catweazel » Thu Sep 06, 2018 1:36 am

Portreve wrote:
Wed Sep 05, 2018 7:19 pm
catweazel wrote:
Mon Sep 03, 2018 3:16 am
Portreve wrote:
Sun Sep 02, 2018 7:20 pm
I'm certain you folks have all heard really crazy stuff from people with respect to tech support.
I used to have a cartoon syndicated in a national Australian broadsheet, the strip was called "Help Desk" - oh, good grief, I could tell you some funny ones. One that comes to mind is a call I took from a woman:

BANG! CRASH! SCREAM! AAAIIIEEE!!! AAARRRGGHH! SHUT UP! I'M ON THE PHONE! BANG! SCREAM! CRASH! SMASH! WAIL! WAIL! SCREAM! OH! DAMMIT! I'LL CALL BACK AFTER THE SCHOOL HOLIDAYS! <click>
I tried obvious ways of searching for your strip, but found nothing. What was it called? Are there any extant copied still to be found?
It was called "Help Desk" and it ran in the computer section of The Australian. There may be some still around as I gave publishing rights to the School of the Air here in Australia and to a book author. Goodness, it was years ago now.
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Re: Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

Post by lsemmens » Thu Sep 06, 2018 7:46 am

I remember seeing "Help Desk" way back in the day. So, does that mean you are famous? :D
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Re: Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

Post by catweazel » Thu Sep 06, 2018 7:49 am

lsemmens wrote:
Thu Sep 06, 2018 7:46 am
I remember seeing "Help Desk" way back in the day. So, does that mean you are famous? :D
Infamous, maybe :)
¡uʍop ǝpısdn sı buıɥʇʎɹǝʌǝ os ɐıןɐɹʇsnɐ ɯoɹɟ ɯ,ı

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Re: Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

Post by Portreve » Thu Sep 06, 2018 8:34 pm

Just ran across this in looking for tech-support related funny images:

Image
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Re: Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

Post by lazarus » Fri Sep 07, 2018 5:04 am

In another life, in the days of top-loading hard-drives, I was called in to emergency trouble-shoot a DEC VAX/VMS system that refused to boot after extended down-time over school holidays.

It didn't take long to establish that somehow a rat not only managed to get into their "clean-room," but had also managed to establish a very comfy nest built on top of the mobo array and was quite happily raising a mischief of pups. On cleaning the nest out, it looked like 'twas made from a chewed porno mag. :lol: That detail didn't make it into the service report.

I was later called back to the same tertiary school when they were switching over to a distributed WFW3.11 PC network, to work out why their individual LANs (eg. Administration, Science Dept, etc,) suddenly wouldn't talk to each other.

Maybe it was because the old VAX/VMS was their server? And no-one thought to actually build up a replacement server before calling in the contractors to physically yank the "old" computer out? I reported that one as Bureaucratic Error and declined to place a quote for the "repair." :roll:
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Re: Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

Post by sportsman » Fri Sep 07, 2018 5:29 am

I remember when I was working as a Tech Support, customer called in and saying that he doesn't have WIFI on his laptop. So I asked all possibilities why he experienced that. And the most epic ending is, WIFI button on laptop is not on. :roll:

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Re: Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

Post by catweazel » Fri Sep 07, 2018 10:08 pm

Portreve wrote:
Wed Sep 05, 2018 7:19 pm
I tried obvious ways of searching for your strip, but found nothing. What was it called? Are there any extant copied still to be found?
I found one buried deep in my archives... I blacked out my real name.

Image
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Re: Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

Post by Portreve » Sat Sep 08, 2018 7:56 am

catweazel wrote:
Fri Sep 07, 2018 10:08 pm
Portreve wrote:
Wed Sep 05, 2018 7:19 pm
I tried obvious ways of searching for your strip, but found nothing. What was it called? Are there any extant copied still to be found?
I found one buried deep in my archives... I blacked out my real name.

Image
Cool! Lol!
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Re: Craziest Tech Support Problems or Descriptions You've Heard

Post by catweazel » Sat Sep 08, 2018 8:54 am

Portreve wrote:
Sat Sep 08, 2018 7:56 am
Cool! Lol!
Funnier still, that really happened :)
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