Mental health thread

[pinballfan]

I hope this threads existence is okay with this community. I don't want to mess up the forums equilibrium, but I have felt lonely over the past few days. I'm not sure if there has been a dedicated thread for this topic before, and I'm hoping that it can help anyone else that is feeling down, and needs to get their problems "off their chest". Don't suffer in silence.

Are you depressed, anxious, going through a divorce etc? Post about it here, and hopefully other people can relate to it, give some encouragement and support. Hopefully it won't turn into some sort of political mudslinging type of thing. I hope that there can be serious and calm responses which can at the very least help someone feel a bit better, even if it only lasts for a day, it's positive.

[JerryF]

It's so ironic that you posted this today. It seems that you are talking to me directly!

I've had bouts of depression and this week/weekend has been bad. Luckily, I've already made an appointment and will be seeing a counselor this coming Monday who deals with this.

The first time that this problem occurred, I tried to take care of it myself. That was the worst thing to do for myself. I drank more so that I wouldn't feel so anxious but that made the depression worse. There was a point that I thought I was going crazy.

With some antidepressant medication and therapy, I finally felt "normal". Now, it's time for a tune-up!

Thanks so much for posting this thread. You're wonderful!!!

[Pjotr]

Bad times are bad.

Perhaps a small tip: this has helped me so often in times of trouble:
https://www.webmd.com/fitness-exercise/ ... -walking#1

Brisk pace, an hour (if not feasible, at least 30 minutes) a day, preferably in the woods.

Hope this may help you a bit as well. All the best, guys....

[RollyShed]

Men's Sheds were first set up in Australia partly (largely?) for this reason. New Zealand has 118, Great Britain, if looking at a map, is solidly covered with them. About 8 (12?) in USA.

If you haven't got one, start one, that will keep you busy. Woodwork, metalwork, electronics, BUT, the major item is a cup of coffee (or tea) and talking.

[Mick-Cork]

Men's Sheds [...]

If you haven't got one, start one, that will keep you busy. Woodwork, metalwork, electronics, BUT, the major item is a cup of coffee (or tea) and talking.

Yep, this, and with it a sense of purpose that helps reverse a slide downwards. The men's shed is a great idea, places to talk, share, and realise you're not alone. Places where people find common ground and achieve things together. If there's one around join it, if not - put an ad in a local paper and stick posters up, see if you can gather a group and form a plan. I reckon if you got an initial meetup going things will start to change. Some info on how it's done in Ireland : https://menssheds.ie/setting-up-a-shed/

I remember many years ago in a time of lots of stress waking up in the night with a panic attack. I knew what it was as a family member suffered regularly with them. In the middle of it I said to myself 'this is a panic attack, I can stop it, and I can tell it to 'F' off and never come back'. I think I stopped any pattern developing right there and then. I suspect as humans we're prone to letting things ingrain themselves, if you can nip it in the bud it's easier in the long run.

Pjotr's recommendation equally good. Physical exercise is great for the mind and I'd suggest walking early in the day.

Recognising you're in a slide in the first place is part of the solution, the next is finding the right fuel to generate lift!

[motoryzen]

I try to keep my mentality occupied by something rather than allowing myself to slowly "sink" like into mental quicksand into the nightmares of the past

1. Laughing fat cheek babies
2. True great metal music ( not the garbage emo screemo crap of today..I'm talking old school Metallica and Megadeth. Judas Priest. Speed Metal Symphony, etc) and of course a good variety of other genres. * both listening and playing*

3. Riding motorcycle and practicing Motojitsu.( yes there is a youtube channel called this. Greg is awesome as well as Jerry Palladino from RideLikeAPro and Bret Tkacs)
4. Movie junkie here xD

5. Healthy dose of PC gaming both casual and hardcore demanding titles
6. Bits and pieces of video editing

7. Linux
8. Squooshing my Linux Penguin stress ball I bought from store.Level1techs.com

9. And ...trying to help others with any of the above if I can. *shrugs*

But ...the nightmares eventually happen again..and again. But that doesn't mean I given in. * starts playing Joe Esposito's " You're the Best" for cheesy effect

[AZgl1800]

Tnx for letting us breathe out a bit here..... I used to take meds to keep me in line, now I exercise instead.

My mom suffered her whole life, and did not get good professional help.

so some of her genes are still with me, and I find that I need to get "out of the house" and do something.

for me, early morning is best before the day gets too hot for me to handle. ( medical reasons )

I have six acres of grass and trees, each morning I am using our golf cart to pull a trailer with a water barrel.
we had a lot of volunteer trees come up last year and 60+ of them made it thru the winter.

I rigged up a RV water pump with a Deep Cycle battery to help out with the watering chores.
Last year, we had to stop at each tree, get out of the cart and dip a 1 gallon bucket into the barrel...

for my daughter who is lacking in height, she was unable to use the bottom half of a 55 gallon barrel...
so, I rigged up a pump with a garden hose.

the older trees keep loosing limbs due to age, storms, etc.....
there are two huge trees right now that need a chainsaw to cut them up, a wind blew them over last spring...
it has been in the high 90*F temps which precludes me from working outside, except for maybe 2 hours just as the sun peaks over the eastern horizon...

I can't walk much, as my lower back has a lot of damage, but I can get about and stand for 15 minutes or so, and then take a rest... the golf cart is good for that, gives shade and a seat.





the water pump




tied garden hose to a piece of window trim to make it easier to reach out and water trees




and just a small part of the front yard, this is maybe a half acre that can be seen,
if you look close at ground level, there are a lot of tiny White Flags....
those are marking where the new trees are, so we can find them easy to water,
and to keep me from mowing over them.





and a side view of the cart with the watering hose laying by a larger 'new tree'




and my other little method of "getting out of the house" is to ride my bike

[MurphCID]

Thanks for posting this.

[pinballfan]

Thanks to everyone who has posted so far.

@JerryF: Sorry to hear you've had problems. Hopefully that counsellor can help you. Psychology sessions have never helped me, but it depends on what condition you have and what your situation is. I was diagnosed with social anxiety disorder back around 2007, and it has meant I've been isolated and unemployed since then. Add to that the comparison anxiety when seeing others out and about, it seems as if the majority of society is pretty much forcing everyone else to be 24/7 party people, I always felt that I'm never going to fit in. I judge people on their personality, rather than looks/status/job title etc. It would be interesting to hear more about your situation, and hopefully things will improve. Even if they don't, at least we might be able to give advice or encouragement.

@Pjotr: Exercise helps to a point, but when it comes to having to walk around everyday people, it is tough to not feel down when seeing couples or hearing people really obsessively talking about holidays and experiences while I'm wishing they would just keep it to themselves. People say "wear earphones" but I always found that uncomfortable/distracting while walking about. Still, I will try to keep fit. The pandemic over the last year or so gave me back strain from sitting about too much, so there is work to do!

@RollyShed: I'm like the worst at putting things together. It is cool seeing what other people can create though.

@Mick-Cork: Meet ups are just too difficult, I've fell too far off the "normal" society bandwagon. I'm glad you were able to get over your panic attacks, that must have been a relief.

@Motoryzen: Yeah, there are some great metal bands about. I've always liked the ones you mentioned, but I also like less "mainstream" bands such as Sonata Arctica. I studied movies back in english college (equivalent to american high school I think), but I was too scared to go to University. The party lifestyle put me off, I think I was intellectually capable of going further, but that is distant history now. Obviously Linux has given me a new lease of life for some older hardware, and I like the philosophy of it. If it wasn't for Linux, I wouldn't have joined this site either. It'd be funny if Linux "saved my life".

@AZgl1500: Meds work for some people, but don't for others. I'm not sure why it is, but I hope it helped while you were taking them. Six acres of land sounds fantastic, although the maintenance could be quite demanding, even for a team of people I would guess. Using gadgets to do chores sounds like an excellent idea, sort of like Wallace from Wallace and Gromit, or the Doc from Back To The Future. Back pain can be really debilitating, but it's great that you've found a way to get things done to the best of your ability. Thanks for sharing the pics.

@MurphCID: Thanks for joining the conversation.

[JerryF]

Thanks to everyone who has posted so far.

@JerryF: Sorry to hear you've had problems. Hopefully that counsellor can help you. Psychology sessions have never helped me, but it depends on what condition you have and what your situation is. I was diagnosed with social anxiety disorder back around 2007, and it has meant I've been isolated and unemployed since then. Add to that the comparison anxiety when seeing others out and about, it seems as if the majority of society is pretty much forcing everyone else to be 24/7 party people, I always felt that I'm never going to fit in. I judge people on their personality, rather than looks/status/job title etc. It would be interesting to hear more about your situation, and hopefully things will improve. Even if they don't, at least we might be able to give advice or encouragement.

...

Thanks pinballfan! I've had counsel sessions before and for what I go through, they help. Sorry to hear about your social anxiety disorder. I have anxiety disorder, but not social. I love being around people.

I do take meds to treat the anxiety and depression. They work for me!!!

I know that eventually things will improve. I had my first session and we hit it off right away. I feel very comfortable with him as my counsellor!

Some decisions on my part need to be made and I needed guidance which I think my counsellor will truly help.

Keep in touch and if you'd need to, private message or email me by clicking on the icon after the word Contact: under my profile.

[jimallyn]

Nice to see that we have all gotten over (or are getting over) the "stigma" some people attach to mental illnesses. I have suffered from depression pretty much my entire life, and have taken antidepressants for half my life. For anybody who wants to tell us we're weak and just need to "buck up" or "get over it", please take it somewhere else, we're not interested. Mental illness happens.

[RollyShed]

@RollyShed: I'm like the worst at putting things together. It is cool seeing what other people can create though.

If you looked at the website for our Shed you'd see if nothing else, get there by 10.00 a.m. for a cup of tea or coffee, the important things of life. In case you don't figure it, it is the social interaction that takes place. Oh, and a biscuit (cookie?) as well....

As for making etc. a helping hand is always handy, hold this, get that, sort of thing. Interaction.

[JerryF]

Nice to see that we have all gotten over (or are getting over) the "stigma" some people attach to mental illnesses. I have suffered from depression pretty much my entire life, and have taken antidepressants for half my life. For anybody who wants to tell us we're weak and just need to "buck up" or "get over it", please take it somewhere else, we're not interested. Mental illness happens.

Well said!

[pinballfan]

@RollyShed: I'm like the worst at putting things together. It is cool seeing what other people can create though.

If you looked at the website for our Shed you'd see if nothing else, get there by 10.00 a.m. for a cup of tea or coffee, the important things of life. In case you don't figure it, it is the social interaction that takes place. Oh, and a biscuit (cookie?) as well....

As for making etc. a helping hand is always handy, hold this, get that, sort of thing. Interaction.

So basically the "shed" is a word for a place of gathering for people? When you said shed, I instantly thought of an actual tool shed, and thought you meant putting those together.

It makes sense to meet up with people to try to get over anxiety and depression, but people that are in my situation find it difficult to venture out and introduce ourselves to new people. I'm so used to being rejected, having people sneer and patronise me from first impression, it is really nerve racking going into a new place. Even for areas designated for mental health sufferers, I've still had counsellors get annoyed with me for being apprehensive/reluctant to go into a coffee shop, cafe etc. It's the negative judgement that gets me down.

The same applies to finding work. It feels like being told to dive into the deep end of a swimming pool if you don't know how to swim. I need some sort of training opportunity, a way to ease into a situation, with some sort of backing and reference from someone established. It's all down to me to go out, apply, be confident, and I cannot be something I'm not. I know I could work hard and be reliable, it's just that society doesn't seem to want me to exist as I am. It's really daunting reading through job descriptions and seeing how many skills and all the experience they require, and how inexperienced I am....

I worry too much, way before I actually am in a situation, let alone during and after, Still, if others around here manage to find success and improve their lives, then that would give me some hope.

[RollyShed]

So basically the "shed" is a word for a place of gathering for people? When you said shed, I instantly thought of an actual tool shed, and thought you meant putting those together.

I'm just off to the Shed but a quick reply.

It is a place to do things with tools. That's the excuse for it but there are some there that only make the tea and sweep the floor. Sheds were first set up in Australia and with government support because of the mental health thing. They spread to other civilised countries and finally to others such as USA, 12? now. New Zealand - 118 in a country of 5 million. There are a vast number in the UK and Ireland.

We are to have some brought to our Shed specifically because of mental problems and knowing that, will handle things as best we can and as part of the "job".

Another note, your writing appears to be good. Spelling, syntax etc. so obviously you can think. Hitting something with a hammer isn't all that hard. My main part at the Shed is electronics and computers so it isn't just hitting things with a hammer though that's what I was doing the other day to fix a power supply for a router. If it doesn't go get a bigger hammer, though admittedly that's years of hitting electronics with a hammer training...

[pinballfan]

So basically the "shed" is a word for a place of gathering for people? When you said shed, I instantly thought of an actual tool shed, and thought you meant putting those together.

Sheds were first set up in Australia and with government support because of the mental health thing. They spread to other civilised countries and finally to others such as USA, 12? now. New Zealand - 118 in a country of 5 million. There are a vast number in the UK and Ireland.

We are to have some brought to our Shed specifically because of mental problems and knowing that, will handle things as best we can and as part of the "job".

Another note, your writing appears to be good. Spelling, syntax etc. so obviously you can think. Hitting something with a hammer isn't all that hard. My main part at the Shed is electronics and computers so it isn't just hitting things with a hammer though that's what I was doing the other day to fix a power supply for a router. If it doesn't go get a bigger hammer, though admittedly that's years of hitting electronics with a hammer training...

Well, I'd not heard of them before, but it's good to know that there are opportunities out there. Perhaps I'll come across some sort of group locally one day.

Thanks for the intellectual praise. I'm not university educated, but I believe I have some useful skills that would come in handy with various jobs. In the past I would help out people with various computer related issues, but I think more people are switching to laptops/mobile devices, and it's a bit like a "tv dinner" (ready meal) mentality for them. The moment they face a problem they just buy a newer device, or send it back to the company for maintenance. I've never been comfortable messing with the insides of a power supply due to fear of electric shock, but I have built PCs from scratch and sorted out all sorts of software mishaps, such as being locked out of windows. It was a lot easier with bios, less simple with uefi.

That's another thing, pc repair can be really stressful. A lot of people seem to think it must be easy because I'm proficient enough with it, but the unique problems that present themselves (sometimes never before encountered) can take literal days to figure out. Still, it would be fun working with other experienced tech people to try and fix everyday users computers. I think there is a pc company in America which is like some sort of voluntary scheme, which employs others to fix stuff. I think it's called RE:PC. Would be ideal if I could do that sort of thing, it seems to be less pressurised than a typical shop-esque business.

Physically intensive work seems to be less stressful mentally.

[AZgl1800]

My daughter's 3 year old ACER laptop is driving me Mental.

it keeps loosing the WiFi card, or it seems to.
Win10 claimed it was not available,
dual booted into Pepperment and it said it was not available.

powered it down,
Power ON, F12 and selected my 19.3 Cinnamon ISO thumbdrive, and Wallah!!! WiFi is just fine



Powered it OFF,
Powered back on, used F12 to select Win10 and now it works ??

[absque fenestris]

Yes, I can agree with AZgl1500 and pinballfan. Windows 10 is not good for mental health and physically more intensive work would have done well, but consisted in the physical destruction of the laptop. Which in turn would be detrimental to financial health.

Trigger: Windows decided not to know GIMP anymore. Well, can happen. GIMP and G'Mic downloaded again - but alas! The Nvidia card no longer knows GIMP. Well, Intel's graphics works fine, but why the hell do I have a dedicated Nvidia card?
The annoyance is now very big, highly unhealthy.
The attempts to solve this via system settings result in not so funny hiding games of the Nvidia card: am still there / am no longer there / maybe I am there ...
Cleaver, Maxwell's Silver Hammer - what do I know - but I hate the beast.

Back to more peaceful waters - Cinnamon comforts.

[RollyShed]

The whole thing about the Mental Health thing is interaction with others on a face to face basis. This is probably the key to the Shed thing. If nothing else the cup of coffee (or tea) and definitely a biscuit (cookie) while sitting discussing the world - on a friendly basis. That is friendly towards those you talk with not necessarily the subject. If talking about the idiots in the outside world, rolling ones eyes is a good idea.....

[MurphCID]

Yes, I can agree with AZgl1500 and pinballfan. Windows 10 is not good for mental health and physically more intensive work would have done well, but consisted in the physical destruction of the laptop. Which in turn would be detrimental to financial health.

Trigger: Windows decided not to know GIMP anymore. Well, can happen. GIMP and G'Mic downloaded again - but alas! The Nvidia card no longer knows GIMP. Well, Intel's graphics works fine, but why the hell do I have a dedicated Nvidia card?
The annoyance is now very big, highly unhealthy.
The attempts to solve this via system settings result in not so funny hiding games of the Nvidia card: am still there / am no longer there / maybe I am there Cleaver, Maxwell's Silver Hammer - what do I know - but I hate the beast.

Back to more peaceful waters - Cinnamon comforts.

Exactly Windows 10 (or any windows) is not good for your mental health.