Last night was the coolest of them all at the Mint lounge.
What a bunch! After a few refreshing Mint Juleps, everybody stopped being serious and they started telling stories.
The Fortune Machine
At the Grand Central Station, Joe Pasta stopped at the bar for a drink. He had some time to kill before his train would leave for Chicago.
In the corner across the room, Joe noticed something that looked like a game machine.
The bright, colorful screen, read: FORTUNES! PREDICTIONS! PRIZES! ONLY 50 CENTS!
So he went to the machine, to have some fun. After all, he had lots of time before the 9:45 train.
He puts a coin in it and pulls the lever down.
A few flashes and a message appears:
You are Joe Pasta, age 35, a plumber, resident of New York City, and you are waiting for the 9:45 train to Chicago.
Congratulations! Your IQ registers above average!
Have a nice trip Sir.
Joe couldn't believe his eyes. "How could a slot machine know so much about me", he thought.
"Nah! There's gotta be a gimmick to it. Maybe there's a guy I know, behind all this, that's pulling my leg".
He goes back to the bar for another drink. "Make it a double cause I ain't got much time left", he told the bartender.
But Joe's curiosity was too much. He goes back to the machine.
The coin in, the lever down, and a new message flashes: You are Joe Pasta, age 35, a plumber, resident of New York City, and you are waiting for the 9:45 train for Chicago, blah, blah, blah.
" Damn it!" he thought, "I ain't gonna take any more s**t from you".
He had to go to the men's room. There, he saw a hobo with a dirty jacket and a filthy hat. Then, an idea popped in his head.
He says to the man: "could I borrow your jacket and your hat for 10 minutes. I'll give you 5 dollars!"
Back to the machine again. "This time I'm sure gonna fool the damn machine", he thought.
Another coin in and a message pops up!:
You are Joe Pasta, age 35, a plumber, blah, blah, blah......
Nobody can fool me! Joe Pasta!
Your IQ does not register any more. The meter points to the red IDIOT range!
By a recent time check and a re-evaluation of your appearance, as well as the odor of your breath,
it is evident that you are not going anywhere this evening.